Most of what I have ever posted has been something angry and depressing. I know it doesn’t make for a great blog most want to read, but much of it I feel needs to be said. Maybe one day I’ll have some fluffy stuff to say but it hasn’t happened yet.

I shared my brother’s gofundme request on Google+ and my fiance shared it as well. Then, some p.o.s. decides to go and be…well, a p.o.s. about it; but this is the internet so of course there is a prick out there. Out of everyone else in my family,  my brother has a chance to do so much better than the rest of us. He has been in the military, in a pretty good line of work. He has finished school, gotten into a good marriage(they are genuinely a good pair), and he is so smart. He deserves to have a good job.

He believes he found one and has gotten a job offer. In order to take the job, he needs to move. He has been out of work for a while so doesn’t have the money for the move. He, or rather his wife, is asking for help to do so. I shared it because I can’t afford to help him. I would if I had any money not going to bills.

In the past four years, we have had two family members die, our father has had a stroke, and my brother has been robbed a few times since being out of work. He deserves a break. If you can, help him. If not, don’t but keep your inaccurate thoughts to yourself.



It’s something I am so very tired of in life inn my life, and in what I hear going on for others. I hear of it happening to others and agree that something should be done. Everyone out there should stop teaching it. Whether it be religious, racial, or gender. It is ignorance and it should stop.

My son just went through the religious side of it in a sense. He drew a pentagram because he likes to draw everything and anything. Some stupid other child told him that they were no longer friends because it’s evil. My son says he drew that particular thing for a friend but I don’t really care. I don’t force a belief on my child and don’t believe anyone else should either. I tell him what I believe and tell him to learn about religion and decide for himself what feels right in his heart.

I do want to say this to everyone who will read this. A symbol is not good or evil and does not have power. The good or evil is in your heart and head. You are what’s good or evil in your life as well as those around you. The person (or child) who is intolerant is evil. The person who cuts someone down because their clothes aren’t designer or maybe have a few holes is evil. The ones who don’t tolerate the choices others make that don’t affect them personally are evil.

The ones who mind their own damn business and let people live their own lives are good people. The ones who don’t try to destroy a family just because they don’t like something they do differently are good. The ones who share their feelings and beliefs, but don’t tell you that you are believing wrong are good. The ones who try to understand -not control- are good.

That is all.

Today in the World

It’s been a while, yet again, since I have been on here. I’m now working a job that makes me feel dead tired every night and all sorts of things have gone on so I hadn’t had time. We moved and have a place to live. Hopefully soon we will both be working and I can catch up on my separate obligations.

I’ve kept up on some events going on while trying to to keep too close an eye on things in the world. It sickens me. I mean literally, not just figuratively. I actually get sick reading about all the garbage going on. I have grown up knowing how racism feels. From some one with mixed parentage it can tend to be worse because not one damn person accepts you when all the ones around you are brought up around that bs. It is learned. Most children love whatever they are around and fight with whatever they are around when they are mad. It is the people who teach those children to hate a specific race, relgion, gender, or gender preference. It has been taught to teach their peers in such a demeaning way.

Racism should no longer exist in America, but it does. The cops who stop you just because of what town you’re in and what color you are. The people who don’t like someone just because of their color. Keep teaching hate and that is what you’ll always get. Fight it with violence instead of brains and it will never be eradicated.

The gender crap is next on this list. So what if you like the same sex or the opposite? Who should care but you? Still with the violence. No, straight people should not be persecuting something that has been around since the dawn of man (both in the human and animal kingdoms). Homosexuals should neither be persecuting the reverse. The people that want to bring up the bible should also note that it is not their job, or right, to judge.

How in the world does anyone believe that stooping to the level of the lesser person is the right way to go?!?! Live your life! Educate yourself and families so that this world becomes more intelligent instead of failing to thrive!  Teach tolerance! Teach love!

Being Torn Stinks

So many times I wish my life would end. It’s odd because I really don’t want to pass on either. I keep this silly hope that it’s possible I could do something more. I feel like I’ve failed at everything. Having my first child taken because I let some jerk into my life who hurt him the first time I used his help babysitting. This jerk’s son I wound up carrying seeks to be in control even though he never met him. He hurts himself, me, his sisters. His sisters are starting to follow his cues. I have no work, no home, my family doesn’t care what happens to me. As much as I want to try, I don’t. I want to leave this world. I’m feel so hopeless. My kids don’t seem to need me, they do the opposite of whatever I say anyway. I’m tired of just existing.

Get With The Times

We all know the best places to shop for your community are the local stores and  fresh markets. It helps to keep your community going strong when you shop within it. However, if you have to shop at a brand, most of us nowadays want to do so with convenience. One aspect of that convenience is being able to use your smartphone to get quick coupons for some items and businesses or being able to use gift card apps instead of having to keep the fat wallets. I have shopped at places that offer store specific coupons via the smartphone or internet, but the store personnel have no idea what to do with it. All stores should be training their employees in the technology they use, and keeping up with the times. If you are part of a large chain, your employees should know if they scan a gift card or coupon from the app it is available on or key in some numbers! Your store should also have scanners that work properly! Your chain makes enough money. If they don’t, they can close down the stores they aren’t worried about keeping in operational order. I know managers have a lot of behind the scenes things to take care of, but there should be other competent people there who aren’t just sitting around having a chat in the office while there is work to be done, or continued learning to keep up with. Just my two cents.

The Money Pit

This house has become a money pit and we can no longer afford to keep up with it. We couldn’t keep up with it before really but now its too much.. This Winter has burst the pipes more than once. The most recent being just this morning. The furnace stopped working last winter. Our washing machine has frozen. We couldn’t keep up with taxes so it’s is being sold at auction on the 25th. I hope no one is stupid enough to buy this place. It has more problems we can’t even figure out. We have no where else to go right now but this is not a good place to live unless you have a lot of money to just about rebuild it.

Checking Credit`

It’s always a good idea to do that yearly check. I just found out that I somehow racked up a $196 bill with Doubleday Book Club in late 2012 even though I had no such account at the time. I didn’t receive any books anyhow. Also, somehow I racked up scholastic books at the time too. Only thing I can’t check is where the hell they supposedly went. I haven’t received any books from any club for several years and never left those unpaid so have no idea what this crap is. I know I’ve got to write the credit bureaus but don’t want to deal with it.